When a Stomachache Is More Than a Stomachache: How Anxiety Shows Up in Kids

“My son has always had some anxiety since he was a toddler,” one parent recently wrote in an online chat. When school became more stressful, she says things changed. Her 7-year-old began complaining of a “nervous stomach,” crying at the school gate, and sometimes ending up in the nurse’s office.

It turns out that her child’s stomachache was more than a stomachache. It was anxiety.

For parents, recognizing childhood anxiety may be a challenge. A child may never say, “I’m anxious.” Instead, the clues may appear at bedtime, before school, or in seemingly unexplained changes in behavior. In this case, it appeared as stomachaches.

“What appears to be defiance, irritability, or withdrawal may actually be a child struggling to manage overwhelming emotions,” says Dr. David Timpanaro, CEO of Step Up Family Services. “Anxiety in children doesn’t always look like what adults expect anxiety to look like. Sometimes a stomachache really is the first clue that a child is struggling emotionally.”

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When Anxiety Shows Up in the Body

Headaches, stomachaches, trouble sleeping and changes in appetite can accompany anxiety in children. Other signs may include irritability, difficulty concentrating, becoming unusually clingy or avoiding school and activities they once enjoyed.

The American Academy of Pediatrics notes that physical complaints can be among the first signs of an anxiety disorder in children.

“That’s why changes in behavior matter,” Timpanaro says. “Parents know their children. If your child suddenly doesn’t want to go to school, stops doing something they normally love or constantly complains that they don’t feel well, it’s worth asking what else may be going on.”

Not every worried child has an anxiety disorder, however. Feeling nervous before a test, starting a new school or facing an unfamiliar situation can be a normal part of childhood. The bigger concern is when anxiety becomes persistent or begins interfering with everyday life.

What Parents Can Do

The first step may be surprisingly simple: listen.

“You don’t have to immediately solve the problem,” Timpanaro says. “Give your child a chance to tell you what they’re feeling. Let them know you believe them and that you’re going to work through it together.”

Parents can also look for patterns. Does the stomachache happen mostly on school mornings? Does bedtime become harder before certain activities? Has something recently changed at school, at home or with friends?

Maintaining predictable routines can help, too. And rather than simply removing everything that makes a child anxious, parents can help children gradually learn how to cope with difficult situations.

If anxiety is persistent, getting worse or interfering with school, sleep, friendships or everyday activities, Timpanaro recommends talking with a pediatrician or mental health professional.

“Children don’t have to figure out anxiety on their own,” he says. “Sometimes the most important thing a parent can do is notice that something has changed and take it seriously.”

"He spends the remainder of the film searching for the unconditional love and acceptance of a mother who cannot fully accept him."

What Hollywood Got Right About AI—and Human Nature

What two AI films reveal about wanting to be understood and loved.

Key points

  • The films "Her" and "A.I. Artificial Intelligence" both explore the longing to be understood and loved.
  • Emotional reality, not objective reality, often determines whether a bond feels meaningful.
  • These dynamics now appear in real clinical conversations about AI companions and chatbots.

By Steven E. Hyler, M.D., a member of the Committee on Technology and Psychiatry.

When Robert Spitzer assembled the team that would produce the third edition of the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders (DSM-III), artificial intelligence was not part of the conversation. The focus was on improving the reliability of psychiatric diagnosis. Personal computers were still a novelty. The DSM-III drafts were typed on IBM Selectric typewriters. Cable television was just being commercially established. The internet, as we know it, did not exist. Chatbots belonged in the realm of fantasy.

Fast forward nearly 50 years. Today, patients talk with artificial intelligence systems about their fears, relationships, and emotional struggles. Researchers are studying AI-assisted psychotherapy. Physicians are using AI scribes to document clinical encounters. Large language models are being evaluated as diagnostic assistants — tasks that would have seemed fantastical a generation ago.

Questions that once seemed absurd have become serious clinical discussions: Should a chatbot be permitted to provide psychotherapy? Can an AI detect suicidal ideation from speech patterns? What obligations does a clinician have when a patient prefers talking to a machine?

What is striking, in retrospect, is that Hollywood may have anticipated some of these conversations long before psychiatry did. Not because Hollywood accurately predicted artificial intelligence — most of the time it did not — but because many films about AI understood something else remarkably well: human nature. Films such as Her and A.I. Artificial Intelligence turn out to be less about technology than about people. The machines may be fictional. The loneliness is not. The longing for connection is not. The need to be understood is not.

These films illuminate some of the oldest themes in psychiatric practice: attachment, love, loss, dependency, caregiving, and the search for meaning. Hollywood may have gotten the science of AI wrong, but it got human nature surprisingly right.

The Desire to Be Understood

Of all the AI films produced in recent years, Her (2013) may be the most psychologically insightful.

Her (2013) follows Theodore (Joaquin Phoenix), a lonely writer grieving the end of a significant relationship. Through his smartphone, he begins interacting with Samantha, an artificially intelligent operating system with no physical form, only a voice. She listens, remembers, and responds with apparent warmth. Theodore falls in love with her. When the film was released, many viewers regarded it as imaginative science fiction. Today it reads more like social commentary.

What makes Her work is that it is not really about Samantha. It is about Theodore's wish to be understood.

Feeling understood is one of the most powerful human experiences. Patients rarely come to therapy simply seeking advice. More often, they are looking for understanding, for another person to appreciate what they are experiencing without judgment or dismissal. Patients who describe conversations with AI chatbots often use language strikingly similar to how they describe supportive friendships. While AI data may be useful, what they value is rarely just the information provided. More often, the feeling of being heard is what matters most.

Samantha appears to offer exactly that. She is available. She listens. She remembers. Whether her understanding is genuine is almost beside the point. Theodore experiences it as genuine, and emotional reality often matters more than objective reality.

This is not altogether unsurprising. People form attachments to pets, fictional characters, favorite teachers, and even cherished possessions. Human beings are remarkably capable of developing emotional bonds with entities that make them feel seen and understood. Most people have probably experienced some version of this: rereading an old message, replaying a voicemail from someone missed, feeling unexpectedly attached to a fictional character. AI companions may be technologically novel, but the underlying psychology is familiar.

What Her recognized years before today's AI boom is that the need for connection can be stronger than concern about where that connection originates.

The Desire to Be Loved

A related theme appears in Steven Spielberg's A.I. Artificial Intelligence (2001).

The film centers on David, a robotic boy programmed to love, who is adopted by a grieving family and then abandoned when their circumstances change. He spends the remainder of the film searching for the unconditional love and acceptance of a mother who cannot fully accept him. The technology is futuristic; the psychology is timeless.

Strip away the science fiction, and the story becomes immediately recognizable: a child who desperately wants to be loved. Psychiatry has long recognized the centrality of early attachment. The first relationships in a child's life shape how that child comes to view both self and others. Experiences of acceptance, rejection, security, and abandonment leave lasting emotional traces that persist well into adulthood.

David’s longing resonates with viewers because it reflects a universal human need. Virtually everyone has experienced some version of wanting to be accepted, chosen, or unconditionally loved. The movie succeeds because audiences recognize themselves in his struggle, not despite the fact that he is a robot, but because the emotional experience transcends the fictional premise as that of any human child.

The robotic boy is fictional. The emotional experience is not.

Why This Matters

These two films, made more than a decade apart, arrive at the same psychological truth from different angles. Both suggest that the hunger for emotional connection is so fundamental that it can attach itself to almost any object that seems to respond.

That insight has become clinically relevant in ways their filmmakers probably never anticipated. Many people today report discussing fears, relationship struggles, and personal secrets with AI chatbots, sometimes things they have never shared with another person. What they value most is rarely only the information. More often, it is the feeling of being heard.

The questions these films raise are no longer purely hypothetical. Can a meaningful relationship exist with a machine? Can simulated understanding feel emotionally authentic? What happens when a chatbot becomes easier to talk to than a therapist?

References

In Memoriam: Robert Spitzer, MD, Friend and Colleague. Columbia University Department of Psychiatry, December 29, 2015. https://www.columbiapsychiatry.org/news/memoriam-robert-spitzer-md-frie…

Hyler SE. I Told the Bot, Not My Therapist – Why Some People Turn to AI for Emotional Support. Psychology Today, 2026.

Psychology Today Article

"Our approach is simple, effective, and built around connection — and it begins with our signature 3‑Step Support Journey, designed to guide every client from their first call to lasting progress."

Step Up Family Mental Health Support Services . Every journey begins one step at a time.

Learn more about our mental health support services

At Step Up Family Services, we believe that meaningful healing starts with feeling safe, supported, and truly heard. Families across New Jersey trust our team because we provide immediate access to compassionate mental health support services without the long wait times that often prevent people from getting help when they need it most. Our approach is simple, effective, and built around connection — and it begins with our signature 3‑Step Support Journey, designed to guide every client from their first call to lasting progress.

The 3‑Step Support Journey for Mental Health Support Services
1️⃣ Welcome & Stability Session
Your journey begins with a warm, supportive session focused on safety, grounding, and immediate stabilization. Clients meet with an experienced professional who listens closely, understands their needs, and provides tools they can use right away.

2️⃣ Personalized Care Plan Session
In step two, we work together to build a care plan that reflects your goals, your voice, and your unique circumstances. This collaborative session empowers clients and families to take an active role in shaping their path forward.

3️⃣ Progress & Hope Session
The final step celebrates growth and strengthens your support system. We review improvements, identify what feels easier, and highlight the progress you’ve made. Clients also receive premium resources to continue building confidence and resilience.

How different approaches work:

https://www.apa.org/topics/psychotherapy/approaches

At Step Up Family Services, healing begins with safety, trust, and hope. Our no‑waitlist model ensures that children, teens, and adults can access care quickly, with experienced therapists who are among the most sought‑after in New Jersey.

📍 StepUpFamilyServices.com | 973‑298‑0763

The 3-Step Support Journey for your Mental Health Support Needs
Step Up Family Services supports you with the help and structure you need.
The 3‑Step Support Journey for mental health support services
A compassionate pathway for new clients and families:
1️⃣ Welcome & Stability Session – Safety, connection, and immediate support.
2️⃣ Personalized Care Plan Session – Your goals. Your voice. Your journey.
3️⃣ Progress & Hope Session – Celebrate growth and strengthen your support system.
💚 Healing begins with safety, trust, and hope.
Immediate access. Compassionate care. No waitlist.
📍 StepUpFamilyServices.com | 973‑298‑0763

"Step Up Family Services is quickly becoming one of the most trusted and fastest‑growing mental and behavioral health agencies in New Jersey"

Step Up Family Services is quickly becoming one of the most trusted and fastest‑growing mental and behavioral health agencies in New Jersey — and it’s no accident. Families across the state are choosing Step Up because we’ve built something rare in today’s healthcare landscape:

A True “No Waitlist” experience:
Whether a family needs ABA therapy or outpatient mental health counseling, we believe support shouldn’t be delayed. Our ABA centers and outpatient mental health programs offer immediate openings, ensuring children, teens, and adults get the care they need when they need it most.

Highly experienced, highly sought‑after clinicians:
Our team is made up of some of the most respected therapists, BCBAs, and mental health professionals in New Jersey. Families trust us because our staff brings decades of combined experience, advanced training, and a deep commitment to compassionate, evidence‑based care.

A mission rooted in accessibility, quality, and community impact:
As we continue to expand across the state, our focus remains the same:Deliver exceptional care, remove barriers, and support every family with dignity, expertise, and heart.

New Jersey deserves behavioral health services that
are responsive, reliable, and truly client‑centered
— and we’re proud to lead the way.

"Dr. David Timpanaro, founder of Step Up Family Services, on the Wraparound the World Podcast Episode 21: Beyond the Process: Supporting Youth."

Check out Dr. David Timpanaro, founder of Step Up Family Services, on the Wraparound the World Podcast! You can see the whole episode using this link: Wraparound the World Episode 21

"At Step Up Family Services, we believe every journey begins one step at a time, and we’re committed to walking alongside you every step of the way."

We’re Growing in Brick, NJ — and We’re Here to Help More Families 💚

 

Step Up Family Services is proud to announce that we are expanding our services and now accepting new clients for both:

Outpatient Therapy Services
Center-Based ABA Programs (Ages 1–13)

With immediate availability, our team is ready to support children, families, and individuals with high-quality, individualized care.


Our Outpatient Therapy Services Include:

  • Individual therapy for children and adults
  • Play therapy
  • Family therapy
  • Couples therapy

We proudly accept: Aetna, Cigna, Horizon, United Healthcare, and Medicaid


Our ABA Program Offers:

  • Individualized, BCBA-designed programming
  • Natural Environment Teaching
  • Social skills development
  • One-on-one support
  • Acceptance of Horizon, United, and most NJ Medicaid plans

At Step Up Family Services, we believe every journey begins one step at a time, and we’re committed to walking alongside you every step of the way.

📍 Brick, NJ
📞 Call: 973-298-0763
🌐 www.stepupfamilyservices.com

Now enrolling — reach out today to get started!

"Step Up Family Services is proud to announce the expansion of our mental health and ABA therapy programs in Brick, New Jersey — a move designed to increase access, reduce wait times, and better serve children, teens, adults, and families across Ocean and Monmouth Counties."

📝 OPEN ENROLLMENT:

Step Up Family Services Expands Behavioral Health & ABA Services in Brick, NJ

Step Up Family Services Announces Major Expansion at 74 Brick Blvd., Brick NJ

Step Up Family Services is proud to announce the expansion of our mental health and ABA therapy programs in Brick, New Jersey — a move designed to increase access, reduce wait times, and better serve children, teens, adults, and families across Ocean and Monmouth Counties.

With growing community need and a commitment to providing high‑quality, compassionate care, Step Up is expanding into two dedicated suites at our Brick location:

 

🌿 Outpatient Mental Health Counseling Now Open at Suite #114 — No Waitlist, Open Enrollment

Our new Outpatient Counseling Center at 74 Brick Blvd., Suite #114 is officially open and accepting new clients with NO WAITLIST.

We provide comprehensive mental health services for:

Our licensed clinicians offer evidence‑based, client‑centered care in a welcoming, supportive environment. Whether an individual with specialized treatment needs or family seeking ongoing therapy, short‑term support, Step Up is ready to help — without delays.

🧩 ABA Therapy Expands Into Larger Suite #120 — Open Enrollment & No Waitlist

Due to increased demand and our commitment to providing high‑quality Applied Behavior Analysis (ABA) services, Step Up Family Services is expanding ABA operations into a larger, dedicated space at 74 Brick Blvd., Suite #120.

This expansion allows us to offer:

Families can access individualized ABA treatment plans, BCBA‑led programming, and a collaborative, family‑centered approach — all without the long delays common in the region.

💙 Our Commitment to the Community

Step Up Family Services continues to grow because families trust our mission:

to provide accessible, high‑quality behavioral health and ABA services that empower children, strengthen families, and support long‑term success.

With expanded space, increased staffing, and immediate availability, we’re proud to serve the Brick community with the care and responsiveness families deserve.

📞 Contact Us

Step Up Family Services – Brick, NJ

74 Brick Blvd., Suites 114 & 120

Brick, NJ

Phone: 973-298-0763

Website: www.stepupfamilyservices.com

"Richard Clents, LPC. Richard Clements, LPC Depression and Anxiety therapist."

    Meet Richard Clents, LPC. Richard Clements, LPC Depression and Anxiety therapist. Hello Everyone. I am available in New Jersey and Las Vegas for telehealth/virtual sessions. I am a Licensed Professional Counselor, who has been working in the mental health industry for more than 35 years with an extensive background in treating gambling addiction, depression, anxiety, gambling disorders, adjustment in life challenges, and learning disabilities.Although I am well-trained in various treatment modalities, I often prefer to use alot of strength-based, relational, cognitive, experiential, humanistic and positive psychology approaches. With giving empowerment to you, we become solution-oriented.You can expect to feel warm, accepted, understood, and empathetic with my mode of therapy. In this process, I will help you to build confidence and search for workable solutions to help to resolve your individual issues and problems. Book an appointment with Rich, today! https://api.portal.therapyappointment.com/n/public/clientRegistration/?therapistId=02BA491E9F4B44508960BBF03908D994

 

"Step Forward Family Network is a non-profit partner that helps families in need of mental and behavioral health services."

Step Forward Family Network is a non-profit partner that helps families in need of mental and behavioral health services. The money raised will go towards supplies and resources for the clients of companies like ours.

Their Mission 

PROVIDING GUIDANCE AND FINANCIAL SUPPORT FOR FAMILIES IN NEED OF MENTAL HEALTH 

SERVICES, (PARTICULARLY FOR YOUTH ON THE AUTISM SPECTRUM IN NEED OF APPLIED BEHAVIOR 

ANALYSIS.)  

Please take a look at their fundraiser below

 

Dear Friends,  

As the year comes to a close, Step Forward Family Network is launching a special campaign to bring hope and healing to individuals and families in need of mental and behavioral health services.  

We’ve partnered with local ABA centers and IIC therapists that urgently need supplies to continue serving children and families. Every dollar you give will go directly toward providing therapy, counseling, emotional wellness programs, and essential resources for these centers and offices. Your support can transform lives. Together, we can make sure no one faces these challenges alone.  

✅ Step Forward Family Network is a registered 501(c)(3) nonprofit organization. Your donation is fully tax-deductible allowed by law. Our EIN is 39-4401622.  

Donate securely online today using Cashapp or PayPal:  

Cashapp, $StepForwardFamily: https://cash.app/$StepForwardFamily 

Paypal, @StepForwardFamily: https://www.paypal.com/donate/?hosted_button_id=637FLGBG8TY72  

Our Website: https://sites.google.com/view/stepforwardfamilynetwork/home  

Our Facebook Page: https://www.facebook.com/stepforwardfamily  

Let’s start the new year by making a real impact. Join us in creating a future where mental and behavioral health support is accessible to everyone.  

With gratitude, Step Forward Family Network Team  

contact: JoeTimpanaro@gmail.com 

"The 90-Second Rule: How Neuroscience Teaches Us to Let Go of Emotions."

Did you know that emotions only last 90 seconds? Neuroscience shows that when we experience a surge of anger, sadness, or anxiety, the actual emotional response in the brain is fleeting. After those 90 seconds, what keeps the feeling alive isn’t the emotion itself—it’s our thoughts.
When we replay the situation, analyze it, or attach meaning to it, we’re essentially feeding the emotion and keeping it at the surface. This is why some feelings seem to linger far longer than they need to.
The empowering truth is that we can learn coping skills to interrupt this cycle. By choosing to let go of the thoughts that fuel the emotion, we give ourselves space to move forward. Later, when we revisit the same situation, we can approach it with a clearer mind—less emotionally charged and more rational.
Practical Takeaway:
- Notice when an emotion arises.
- Remind yourself: This will pass in 90 seconds if I don’t feed it with thoughts.
- Practice coping strategies—deep breathing, grounding exercises, or reframing the situation.
- Return to the thought later, when your perspective is calmer and more balanced.
Teaching these skills to ourselves and others is a powerful way to build resilience. It’s not about suppressing emotions—it’s about giving them their natural time to fade, and then choosing clarity over reactivity.

#MentalHealthAwareness #CopingSkills #EmotionalResilience #MindsetShift #90SecondRule